Cheap Honeymoons

Jul 04, 2010

So I know that the title makes this sound like an Expedia commercial..maybe Priceline…but there is a point I will get to; after the analogies of course…lol

I have had several conversations this weekend with some of my married friends, and before I am chastised for sexism, those of both sexes. There seems to be a running theme with each one of them. It starts with a phrase like “I remember when we were first dating/married, they used to _____ (insert act or gesture of love here) all of the time. Now I have to ask repeatedly or even barter for it”. Granted that I cleaned that sentence up a tad, but the thought seems to be that there is definitely a honeymoon phase that people go through where they are doing the dishes, folding laundry, and basically being on their best behavior. This typically happens in the beginning of the relationship where they are trying to win the other person over- that best foot coming forward as it were.  The irony is that after they succeed in getting the interest and commitments of the other party, those acts seem to diminish and warrant an act of holiness to continue. Logically, you would assume that each individual should keep doing the things that led them to the other, but it seems as if the opposite is true. That is not to say that they do not find those happy places with each other and have great marriages/relationships, just that the “closing” section is over. In order to watch the game on Sunday, new shoes are purchased in trade. Or, in order to get those 1000 count Egyptian sheets, there may also need to be high end electronics purchased. Suffice it to say that in order to get what the other really wants, there is an additional cost involved.

So, how does this effect what I do as a Profyler? Simply put, I have witnessed this a couple times in the past two weeks regarding my clients and candidates and have seen extra money be spent where it was not needed. As an example, we had a client (let’s call them company A) who met, and fell in love with a candidate on the first meeting the first week of June. They were ready to make an offer almost immediately, and the candidate was so infatuated with Company A that he actually would have taken a 2% salary drop in order to obtain the role. Rather than this occurring and both sides enjoying their new found love, the process dragged on for almost 4 weeks. During this time the candidate received another offer from a different company that was significantly higher than Company A put forth. Now we have a problem. The candidate still loves Company A, and they love him, but there is now a new piece of the puzzle of an offer that is higher than both his current salary and the offer from Company A. The situation was resolved by Company A making a new, higher offer and the candidate accepted. Had they moved quicker, they would have saved themselves a significant amount of money. Before this becomes a client slated post, know that it affects both sides. Clients have to pay more, and candidates have the higher expectation and smaller ramp time for their learning curve as they are being compensated to more quickly contribute. We are seeing this with another client as I type this. The process has hit a slower phase, and every passing day the salary offer will have to be higher to convince this passive candidate to move. The client is literally costing themselves money by not pushing the process.

So here is how the analogy works. The initial part of the interview phase is like the first part of dating/marriage. There is that euphoric feeling that comes naturally with it, and things can get done much quicker with no added cost or reciprocal act involved. As time progresses, the cost goes up, as does the expected payment for things that could have been cheaper initially. From a personal perspective, I completely get that you have to make sure that the “candidate” is perfect for you before moving forward, as in interviewing for a professional position. However, making the other party wait ups the expected ante and cost involved. A walk on the Monon and dinner at Bub’s Burgers is replaced by St. Elmo’s and a show at the Hilbert. Same thing in interviewing; a flat move is replaced by larger expectations in salary to accept the offer the longer the process drags on.

A simple rule, were I in a position to implement from a market perspective……if it feels right, sounds right, and looks right….move on it. Do not wait…..the bottom line difference is more than worth the leap of faith.

About the author

Doug Rowe wrote 23 articles on this blog.

My experience is in matching top talent with the opportunities that meet their career goals while simultaneously exceeding the requirements of my clients. I believe that the cultural and environmental fit is as important if not more so than the technical. This personality and culture matching is where I excel.